My Chemical Cocktail

I am here to address a misconception floating around in our society. I can’t tell you how many people I have met which say that depression and anxiety isn’t a real disease. They believe that it is all in your mind and if you have strong enough willpower that you can push it out of your mind. The people who can’t “shake” depression and anxiety on their own are seen as weak, lazy or drama queens. To take medications for either of these problems is like admitting to the world that you can’t handle the pressures of your own life. I have even had doctors tell me that they never prescribe medications that “mess with your head” because it isn’t “natural”.  There are many people out there who are too embarrassed to go to a doctor and admit that they have a problem in fear of being perceived as weak.

My name is Jessie and I have both anxiety and depression. They are ailments that I have struggled with for many years now, and I will probably continue to have struggle with this for the rest of my life. Now I don’t want you to feel bad for me, I would consider myself to be very lucky in life. I grew up in a loving Christian family, have many great friends, and am now married to the love of my life. With a background like that many people say “Your life sounds pretty great! Why would YOU struggle with depression?” Because depression/anxiety is not selective; they can go after anyone and at any time in their life.

Now I seem to have the cards stacked against me, because depression/anxiety runs in my family. Just like there are those that are more prone to contracting heart disease, or breast cancer or diabetes, mental disorders can be passed down through generations. I believe that my anxiety/depression is chemical imbalance in my brain, a grand cocktail of hormones and chemical receptors all churning together to create utter chaos when the time is right. Which is why I am an avid proponent of using medications to help keep the chemical cocktail party at bay so I can live my life normally.

I am hoping to use this blog to help enlighten those who don’t fully understand anxiety and depression and to gossip about my own life. I hope I can others also who are struggling with the same mental ailments and create a community in order to support one another. 

"When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul" Psalm 94:19